Scorpion's Illegal Adventure

Chapter 11

The skies were dim and filled with clouds as Stryker was hot on Scorpion’s trail, literally. He followed the path of flames into the junkyard to get his chance at capturing the yellow muthafukka. He exited his car and pulled out his gun.

“I’ve got you now,” he whispered to himself, “just show your face and I’ll pop this cap right through your grill, dog”

Stryker crept through the junkyard, looking through every crevice in hopes of seeing an undead ninja guy in a Halloween costume. Little did he know, Scorpion was stalking him like a serial rapist.
Scorpion was snuggling in between two piles of crushed cars, watching Stryker as his dumbass played a horrible game of hide and seek. He waited for Stryker to get within range, and he executed his ambush.

“GET OVER HERE!” Scorpion yelled, slinging his spear directly for Stryker’s head.

“Golly!” Stryker said as he ducked. He was a millisecond away from being stuck in the temple.

The spear shot into an old rusty bicycle, and got stuck in the mangled spokes. Scorpion retracted his spear without realizing, and took the bike with it. The speared bike flew right into Stryker, knocking him off his cheap combat boots. Scorpion stomped on the bike when it reached him, and pulled the spear from it.
Stryker got up off the ground and brushed the dirt off.

“So we meet again, ninja man,” Stryker said in a gritty Batman tone.

“You should leave while you have the chance,” Scorpion told him, “there’s no one here to bail you out, you’ll die here if you don’t leave”.

“I don’t care, I’d rather die on this mission than give up and let you go,” Stryker replied, trying to keep his cheesy voice gritty enough.

“So be it. But first, you should take some cough drops for that rugged voice o’ yers,” Scorpion advised.

Stryker grinned, glad that someone noticed his “cool” voice. He gripped his gun and aimed at Scorpion’s knee. He shot off a round only for it to ricochet off of Scorpion’s metallic shin guards.

“Ha, you’re gonna need more than puny guns to defeat me!” Scorpion boasted.

“Oh yeah? Well I’ve got more than just guns!” Stryker said with a huge smile.
He took a bomb from his waist and tossed it at Scorpion. It made that whistly bird noise that it always does.

Scorpion was quick with reflexes, and burst into a ball of flames. The explosive flames detonated the bomb before it could reach Scorpion. He stood there aflame, looking like a Super Saiyan. He chuckled with pride, assured that Stryker had no answer for his fire powers.

“I suggest you move along now, po-leece man,” Scorpion said, “I won’t warn you again.” His flames died down until nothing was left but steam.

“NO! I’ve got you right where I want you, I won’t pass up this opportunity!” Stryker fumed.
Stryker aimed his gun again and shot off all of his ammo. Everything bounced off Scorpion’s armor and none of it struck his skin.

“SHIET!” Stryker yelled, “Goddammit, stupid gun!” He threw the gun to the ground and stomped it in the nuts.

“My turn,” Scorpion said as he charged over to Stryker and hit him in the lip with a right hook.
Stryker fell to the ground but quickly bounced up again. He responded with a hook of his own, nailing Scorpion in the ribs. Scorpion staggered back, clutching his side and gathered himself. Stryker was unrelenting as he dashed over and hit Scorpion with an elbow to the neck.

“C’mon big boy, where’s your magical fires at???”

“Hmph, they aren’t necessary for humans like you. I could kill you with nothing but my fists!”

“Ha! Just try it, I won’t go down that easy!”

Stryker went for the win and flung his knee into Scorpion’s testes and knocked him onto his knees.

“GAH! My nads!” Scorpion cried as he clutched his undead jewels.
Stryker smiled as he stared at his weakened opponent. “You’re not that tough after all!”

“You bish, no man can stand tall while his nuggets are under attack!” Scorpion struggled to say as the pain in his nuts was intense.

Stryker said, “Don’t cry, I’m not gonna kill you or anything. I want you locked up so you can live your life in sorrow and defeat!”

He took out his handcuffs and clamped them around Scorpion’s wrists. He picked Scorpion up and walked him over to his stylish cop car.

“Admit it, freak, you lost this battle!” said Stryker.

“No, the battle has just begun. You haven’t won just yet,” Scorpion said, still nut-hurt.

“Say what you want, words won’t help. I’ve got you now and you ain’t gettin away this time! Muahahahaha!” Stryker chuckled with joy as he tossed Scorpion into the backseat of his cop mobile.

He took out his po-po phone and called up his comrades. “This is Kurtis Stryker reporting in. I’ve got the suspect in custody. His adventure is over.”
 
Chapter 12

Stryker was grinning hard as he revved up his fancy car. He turned around to Scorpion and boasted about how he had finally caught him and he was a hero.

"I'll get a raise thanks to you!" Stryker said, "I'll get loads of donuts from everyone back at the station, AND Sonya might finally let me hit! Nyahahaaa!"

Stryker snickered some more as he rolled off onto the street and headed down the road. He felt so good for himself, knowing he had accomplished something unimaginable for an ordinary po-leece man.


Scorpion was still recovering from his testicular conundrum, and was planning his escape in the meantime. He looked around the vehicle for possible ways, and began formulating his actions. He could not gather the energy to summon his fire powers until his nuts ceased to ail him, and his hands were still tied together with the handcuffs.

Meanwhile, Stryker was calling his comrades and praising himself for nabbing the undead criminal. He made it out to be the biggest achievement that anyone on the entire police force has made. According to him, Scorpion was no match against his skills in martial arts. He said he didn't even have to use his gun.

The time came for Scorpion to go through with his plan. He was going to smash through the window with his head, using the metallic padding on it to bust through the glass. He would then flop out through the window like a fish and hope to land safely on the road. From then on he would run as fast as he could in hopes to evade Stryker.

So Scorpion then took his head and repeatedly slammed it up against the glass. Not even a crack came out of it, though Scorpion became woozy. Stryker heard it and yelled to Scorpion, "Chill out back there!" as he was still on the phone.

Scorpion didn't give up as he kept on ramming his cranium into the window. Before long, the cracks started to come, and the window became fragile enough for Scorpion to finish it. He bashed his head in one last time to shatter the entirety of the window. Stryker gained notice and stopped the car, pulling over to the side.

In a quick fashion, Scorpion wiggled out of the window and flopped onto the ground. His plan was working to perfection. Stryker got out the car, yelling in anger. The last thing he wanted was to see his big catch get away.

Scorpion got up and darted down the road. The handcuffs were still tight on his wrists as he ran in an unusual manner.

Stryker wasn't going to chase him down on foot and leave his car, so he hopped back in it and gave chase.

The pedestrians scattered away, giving Scorpion a clear path to run and Stryker a clear path to chase. Scorpion took a hard left down a street and sent Stryker swerving into a light pole. The front bumper ran straight into the pole as the entire front side of the car wrapped around it. The windshield shattered into millions of pieces as Stryker's head slammed into the steering wheel, knocking him unconscious.

Scorpion was off the hook for now as he came to a jog. He went into an alley for refuge, making sure no one saw him. He walked to the back of the alley to find a group of people dressed in leather. Scorpion wanted no part of it and turned his cuffed ass around. But before he could exit the alley, his ankles were hit with a lasso and he was yanked onto the ground. He was reeled in, sliding across the dirty pavement with an uncomfortable friction.

"Well, well, well. What do we have here?" Kano said with a smirk on his face.

"You!" Scorpion said in realization, "...Kano...." he squinted his eyes in anger.

This group of people in leather was none other than the Black Dragon. They were busy with a gang operation, purchasing drugs from a dealer in a large amount for distribution through their clan. Scorpion's bad luck bit him again as he ran straight into it- while handcuffed.

"I knew I didn't kill you for a reason," Kano said. "We were needing a lab rat for our experiments back at HQ. You seem to be the perfect candidate," he added as he began to smile harder.

"Take him into the truck," Kano instructed one of the Black Dragon members.

"Alright, boss," the large bald-headed man said as he tied Scorpion up with the rope of the lasso and picked him up. "Let's go, ninja man," he said to Scorpion and he carried him to the Black Dragon truck. The rest of the group continued their negotiations with the drug dealer.

Scorpion was infuriated and demoralized. Already in handcuffs, he was now being tied up and carried away to be used for some lab experiment for the Black Dragon.

"You bastards! You have no idea who you're playing with!" Scorpion shouted angrily. "You'll regret this!"

"Hush your mouth," the Black Dragon thug said. "All this yappin ain't gonna do ya nothin."

The thug made it over to the military-style armored truck and opened the back doors. He rearranged some bags and boxes and shoved Scorpion in.

"You'll pay for this!" Scorpion shouted as the thug closed the doors. Scorpion was left to sit in the truck with nothing to do but think as he was handcuffed and tied up. He went through all the trouble to escape from Stryker, yet he was back where he started -tied up and stuck in the back of a vehicle.
 
I'm so glad I got to read this before my wrestling tourney XD. The twists and turns in the story are awesome as usual NS
 
Chapter 13

Surrounded by bags and boxes and cases of unknown junk, Scorpion could find no plausible way of escape. Yet even if he found one, he was still bound by Stryker’s handcuffs and the Black Dragon’s rope. The only possible way he could get himself out of this mess would be to ignite himself and cause a fiery explosion that would rip the ropes and destroy the truck. But this would put a great deal of exhaustion on him as every super duper fire move takes an extreme amount of energy. He would need all available strength in order to defeat his Black Dragon enemies once possible.

He sat for about 45 minutes as the drug deal lingered on. Eventually he heard the chuckling of Kano and his associates as they returned to the truck.

“That was a great deal, mates, perfect day for business,” Kano told his allies.

“Yeah, we sure got a cheap sale,” one of them added.

“And don’t forget the extra prize we found!” a thug said with enthusiasm, the same one that threw Scorpion into the truck.

The gang opened the individual doors of the truck and got in. Scorpion was turned toward the back of the truck so he could not see the thugs, but by listening to each of them talk, he estimated that there were six of them in the truck. It would be a challenge for him to take out all of them without seriously hurting himself in the process.

The truck revved up and drove off after a few minutes. It was headed back to Black Dragon HQ, where Scorpion would supposedly be used in sadistic experiments. Experiments that he could only wonder about.

Through the floor of the truck, Scorpion could feel every bump in the road and every jitter of the vehicle. This made the ride even more uncomfortable, when included in the package of ropes and handcuffs. He was becoming more angry every second considering all the trouble he had already been through. He still wondered how much time he had before his mission was expired. He still needed to find the museum and he still needed to find the Staff of Strongness. With all these thoughts on his mind, he stayed silent throughout the whole ride, pondering his future. Even when taunted by the thugs, he kept his mouf shut.


Before long the crew had reached their destination. They exited the truck with excitement, not only for an accomplished drug deal, but for the upcoming experimentation they taunted Scorpion about.
The big man who was apparently in charge of Scorpion opened the back of the truck like a paramedic opening an amberlamps. He grabbed Scorpion by the tightened ropes around him like he was strapped to a stretcher. However, the operations he would go through would not be in his best physical interests.

“Alright, let’s go,” he said to Scorpion in an eager tone as he pulled him from the truck and dropped him on the ground.

“Say, bastard, don’t drop me on the ground like that! Treat me with more respect, for I am delicate like a variety of flower!” Scorpion said sarcastically, setting his own tone to let the Black Dragon thugs know he would not back down. “My nuts are back to health now, when I’m set free from these ropes, I’ll beat ALL your asses!”

“If you were as large as your ego, you’d make me look like a midget!” the thug said, standing about seven feet tall.

The thug grabbed Scorpion by the end of his roping and pulled him along the ground. He walked toward the front corridor of the large building. This “Black Dragon HQ” seemed a lot more like a crackhouse than a sophisticated base for a big-time crime organization.

“This shit looks horrible! How do seriously call this a headquarters?” Scorpion inquired in smart-assed amazement.

Kano walked over to Scorpion and kicked him in the side. “You shut ya mouth, you won’t be talkin so loud when you’re nothing but a lab rat. Ah yes, you’ll be scared outta your mind, beggin fa help,” he said smugly, trying to intimidate Scorpion.

“Bring him to the laboratory, we’ll be in my office,” he told Scorpion’s keeper.

“Begging you for help, yeah, we’ll see about that,” Scorpion mumbled to himself.

The gang opened the door through a button combination on the keypad. It seemed to be the most expensive thing about the place.

Scorpion was picked up off the ground and carried like a bride. “Hey now, this is a bit gay, don’t ya think? You can’t just drag me on the ground some more?”

“We wouldn’t want the roaches to eat your….pretty….face” the thug told him.

Scorpion looked at the ceiling as he was escorted to the laboratory; everyone else went into a separate room. The lights on the ceiling were dim and some were broken, but they mesmerized him and put him in a daze. He was snapped out of it once the laboratory door was opened up and he was put on the operating table.

“Get ready now, we won’t be giving you any anesthetics,” the thug said smiling, “you’ll feel everything!”

The thug left to regroup with the gang. Scorpion was left alone in the dim lab. He looked around and saw what appeared to be a hospital’s operating room. He put two and two together and realized that this place was in fact an abandoned hospital. The Black Dragon were using it for its size and its surgical availabilities. Around the “Laboratory” as it was now called, he saw lots of weapons on tables and pictures of mutilated bodies stuck up on the walls.

“Aww, sheeeeit,” Scorpion said, wondering what exactly they were planning.

He was left to think about it for just a little while before the door opened again. Kano and two men dressed in surgeon suits entered the room and walked over to Scorpion.

“Is ya body ready?” Kano asked, “we’re gonna have some fun with you” he said putting emphasis on ‘fun’.

“Dear gods, no! Not that!” Scorpion shouted.

“Not what?” One of the surgeons asked.

“My ass! You’re not taking my ass! That’s my worst nightmare!” Scorpion said in fear.

“Your ass?” the other surgeon asked. “We don’t want that. We just want to test out some new toys.”

“Well, toys are better than dicks, I guess. How big are they?”

“What?” asked first surgeon. “Look here, we’re not trying to rape you, ya f*ckin idiot. We came to test out THESE,” he said, grabbing what looked like a round stone.

“What the f*ck is that?” Scorpion asked, “some type of rock? What are you gonna do with that?”

Kano chimed in, “we found it in Chaosrealm on one of our expeditions. We were told it was a magical type o’ rock. One that does some serious damaged to ya insides if digested. Some type o’ disease or somethin’. So we wanted to see first-hand what it would do."

One of the fake surgeons added on. “So what we’re gonna do here is make you swallow it, wait a bit, then cut ya open and see what happens to your organs and what not.”

The other surgeon laughed and asked, “Should be fun, right?”

Kano grabbed a tripod video camera and set it up by the table. “We’re gonna put this on film for reference,” he said. “Don’t worry, you’ll be dead, so you won’t be able to see the operation”

“But you WILL be alive to feel the effects of the rock,” the surgeon said. “I hope it hurts enough!”

Scorpion was still tied up, and he knew the surgeons would only cut the ropes when he was dead. They wouldn’t take their chances and let him escape. To ensure that he wouldn’t get out, they strapped him up with the table’s straps.

“He won’t be going anywhere anytime soon,” the other surgeon said, “he’s tied and strapped more than a bondage porn star!”

The joke would be on them, however. Scorpion is an undead ninja with a skull for a head. He doesn’t have an esophagus.

“Let’s administer the rock now, shall we,” Kano said to the surgeons.

“Alright Ninja Gaiden, let’s get this mask off” one of the surgeons said.

He grabbed Scorpion’s mask and pulled it off to reveal Scorpion’s skull face.

“What the…” the surgeon said in shock as he was putting the mask on a nearby table. “Where’s his face???”

Before anyone could come up with an answer, Scorpion exhaled a giant flame from his mouth, setting the surgeon on fire. This was the first Toasty ever executed from a lab table.

“AHHHHHH!” the surgeon screamed in agony, dropping the rock. “PUT ME OUT PUT ME OUT PUT ME OUT!”

The other surgeon rushed over to the fire extinguisher and grabbed it off of the wall. In the meantime, the fiery surgeon was running around and flailing his arms about. He ran into Scorpion’s operating table and set Scorpion’s ropes on fire.

The other surgeon struggled to figure out the extinguisher. “HOW DO YOU WORK THIS THING?”

Kano yelled in frustration, “READ THE BLOODY INSTRUCTIONS, PULL ON THE B*TCHIN TRIGGA!”

By the time the surgeon figured out the directions, Scorpion’s ropes were burning up and becoming thin, along with the straps on the lab table. The surgeon sprayed his comrade down, but it was too late. The Hellfire had burned him up to the point of death. He was nothing but a crispy carcass.
 
The ropes and straps around Scorpion were thinned to just a few burning strands. Scorpion sat up, untangling the burning material. He got off the lab table, but there was one problem; his wrists were still cuffed behind him. So he did the only thing he could think of, walk over to the surgeon with the fire extinguisher.

“Get back, you demon!” the unlicensed criminal demanded in fear. “Go away!”

The surgeon sprayed Scorpion with the extinguisher, as it was the only thing he had as a weapon. This was exactly what Scorpion wanted.
Scorpion turned around so the cuffs would be sprayed with the cooling chemicals. Once the cuffs were frozen enough, he used his Mortal Kombat strength to break them. They shattered into tiny pieces. Scorpion’s arms were finally free, and he was more than eager to use them again.
The surgeon bolted out of the room and ran to alert the Black Dragon members.
Scorpion was left in the room with Kano. He turned to Kano, showing his maskless skull face, mouth still smoldering with steam.

He grabbed his mask off of the table and put it back on. “Let’s finish this, Kano. I challenge you to MORTAL KOMBAT!” Scorpion said in genuine MK fashion.

“Heh. Alright then, if you want,” Kano agreed.

The two got into battle stance and then went at it. Scorpion struck first with a right hook. Kano responded with an elbow to the neck. They went back and forth in a close battle, neither able to take an advantage.
The five other Black Dragon members came into the room. Kano noticed and told them to stay back, as this was a one-on-one fight. So they just stood by the door and watched.
Kano got Scorpion with his eye laser, right in the chest. Scorpion fell back onto the wall. He bounced off and struck Kano in his robo-eye, damaging it.

“My eye!” Kano yelled as he staggered back, “Do you know how much this thing cost to build?!”

Scorpion was in no mood to answer such a question. He took his sword from his back and threw it at Kano, impaling him in the shoulder. Kano fell back onto the operating table, grabbing his shoulder.
Scorpion walked over to the table as Kano was in pain, mumbling profanities. He grabbed Kano by the neck and held him down on the table. He took his sword with his other hand and yanked it from Kano’s shoulder.

“Any last words?” Scorpion asked.

“…..F*ck you,” Kano said after a brief pause.

“Well f*ck you, too!” Scorpion said as he drove the blade into Kano’s chest. He pulled it out and shunk Kano in the forehead to ensure his death.


The other Black Dragon members looked on with indifference. Scorpion took the blade out of Kano’s head and put it back in his sheath.
The other thugs began to clap. “Good job,” one of them said enthusiastically.

Scorpion was confused. “What are you clapping for?”

“You think we cared for him? We wanted that ******* to die as soon as possible so we could take the clan over for ourselves,” one of the thugs said.

“In fact, we’ve been plotting his assassination for months now,” another one added on.

“Uh….that’s cool. Now can I leave?” Scorpion asked.

“NO, we still have more experiments to do!”

So Scorpion grabbed some operating tools from the table and tossed them like ninja stars. 2 of the thugs got hit in the throat and promptly fell to the ground. Another 3 ran over to Scorpion, taking out knives of their own. Scorpion kicked one in the face, knocking him back. The other two swung at Scorpion, but he ducked, and they ended up chopping each other’s heads off like some dumb dinguses. One of them was Jarek, if anyone cares.
Four of the thugs were dead, and only one was left. It happened to be the large one that carried Scorpion around.

“It’s just you and me now,” he said, “show me what you got!”

Scorpion took his spear out and executed his signature move. “GET OVER HERE!” he shouted as he did many a time before. He grabbed the thug by the head and slammed him into the wall. He then walked over to the mysterious rock from the Chaosrealm and picked it up. He laughed in triumph as he grabbed the thug and shoved the rock into his mouf and down his throat. He stepped back as he watched the thug meet his demise.

“Urrrrrrgh!” the thug groaned as he digested the poisonous rock. Within just a few minutes, the effects began to sink in. He turned green and his skin began to shrivel up. He grew thinner and thinner. He let out one last yell as leaves sprouted out and he turned into a plant.

Scorpion stared in immense confusion. “……What the F*CK?”

The only sense he could make out of it was that it came from the Chaosrealm. He decided not to think about it too much and left the room.
 
*Sorry this user can't comment at the moment. He's passed out from laughing to hard at this awesome story*
:rofl::laugh::rofl:laugh::laugh::rofl:
 
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HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OH MY F UCKING GOD. :rofl: His ass :rofl:
:congrats: Genius level work here, genius level lol Mortal Kombat strength :rofl: One was Jarek :laugh:
 
Oh... Oh my god!

"And turned in to a plant." Ahahaha

That was hilarious! Keep up the great work!
 
Chapter 14

The dim halls were silent all throughout the crusty, dusty, rusty broken down building. Some of the lights flickered, others didn't work at all. If there was any sort of object that wasn't old, broken, or full of spiderwebs, it was a damn miracle set forth by none other than Merlin. The Wizard.

"Now where's the exit?" Scorpion asked himself as he tried to navigate through the maze-like infrastructure. The inner workings of the dull, gray, and cold building were twisting and turning all around like the intestines of a Kombat victim, freshly pulled from the cadavers in a violent fashion like a water hose being pulled from a fiyertruck, like a weird child pulling flowers, in the manner that seems similar to a gardener pulling evil weeds that grow up to be serial killers.

Some yelling was heard from down the hallway. It grew closer and closer. One continuous exhalation that grew greater in decibels by the second. Scorpion prepared himself and was ready to kill any bish that would try to inflict damage upon his impregnable spirit.

From the around the corner of the hallway came the fake surgeon, armed with a two-by-four. He ran up to Scorpion, drawing the plank back, but he was stabbed in the gut by Scorpion and his spear, leaving him without a chance to swing. He promptly dropped the useless thing and fell to the floor. He was quite injured, but he wasn't on the verge of death just yet. He crawled over to the wall and sat up on it, grasping his stab wound and crying like a newborn infant.

Scorpion grabbed the man by his neck and began interrogating him.

"Where's the exit?"

The surgeon attempted to reply, "Eeeeheehuhgbgbbgbgg" His crying, combined with the choking of blood, created an inaudible phrase that Scorpion could not begin to understand.

He kicked the man to ensure that coughed all the blood up, and let him catch a breath before asking again.

"Okay, now WHERE IS THE EXIT?"

The man told him to go straight down the hallway then turn left.

Scorpion let his neck go and he began walking off. But then he realized he would need transportation. He went to the fool again and asked if he had a car.

"Yes......the keys are in the lobby....on the table" the surgeonator said as he began to pass out.

Scorpion tried to ask him where the lobby was, but it was too late as the man had died from his shank wound.

Scorpion walked around a bit to find the lobby. He eventually noticed a sign on the wall that directed him to it. He entered the lobby, found the aforementioned keys, and found the exit.

He walked around the parking lot clicking the key's buttons to find the car it belonged to. There were about 15 vehicles there, all belonging to the Black Dragon. Some of them were large armored vehicles, some were muscle cars. But Scorpion finally heard a door unlock, and it was to a PT Cruiser with a bad paint job.

"F*CKIN C0CK SHIT!" he shouted in disappointment. Out of all the great vehicles there, he had the keys to the shittiest one.

He decided that time was not on his side and he needed to find the museum as fast as possible. So he had no minutes to waste complaining about a car. He got in and dealt with it like a man.

He drove around the town in his shitty car for a while before he came to the local mall. "Surely there must be some sort of map there," he thought as he stole a parking spot from someone.

He got out the car as people stared at his undead self, and walked into the mall. Once inside, he spent half an hour asking people for maps. "WHERE IS THE MAP OF THIS CITY?" "WHERE CAN I FIND THE MUSEUM?" he asked around to people. No one answered him because they were either scared or convinced it was some sort of joke. It's not every day that you see a man in a ninja suit asking for a map.

He kept looking around and asking people until he saw a pair of familiar faces. Faces covered in masks.

Mileena and Skarlet were there attempting rob a jewelery store. They had apparently broken out of prison since the last time Scorpion saw them. Skarlet's head was heavily wrapped in bandages to the point of it looking like a turban.

"Sheeeeeeeit" Scorpion mumbled to himself as he tried to avoid them. But with his luck, it was no surprise to him that Mileena ran up on him from behind and kicked him the balls.
 
:rofl: The return of the whores, excellent work! :laugh:

This must have been inspired by Merlin........
























The Wizard.










Giorgio_Tsoukalos.jpg
 
Chapter 15

"AAAAH NOT AGAIN!" Scorpion said as he dropped to the ground, nuts kicked for the second time that day.

"Nice to see you again!" Mileena said in her childish manner. "How nice of you to come see us"

"You f*cking b*tch! What did I do to you?.....other than leave you for the cops?"

"You shut up now, dear," Mileena said as she kicked Scorpion in the face. "You stay there while we finish our little heist."

Mileena went back to the store and finished the robbery. She and Skarlet emerged from the store with bags loaded with high-priced jewels. They were making their escape, but they had to finish Scorpion first.

"Well honey, it's been nice knowin ya, but you have to die now! We wouldn't want you getting in our way!"

Mileena raised her foot to stab Scorpion with her hooker heels. But Scorpion was aware and quickly swept her leg and knocked her down. He got up slowly, still in severe nut pain.

Skarlet ran up on Scorpion slinging her bag of jewels around like a soap in a sock. Scorpion ducked the attacks and punched her right in the cooch. The hit knocked her back as period blood sprayed everywhere like a busted fire hydrant.

Mileena got up, but quickly fell back down as she slipped in Skarlet's diseased period blood. She hit her head on the floor and got a concussion. Scorpion stepped away from the period blood and grabbed his sword. He was again too weak to use his fire abilities. He aimed his sword at Skarlet's turban head and threw it with his ninja skills. The sword hit its target and cut Skarlet's stupid face in half. Scorpion walked cautiously through the period blood and over to the sword. He took the sword out and aimed it at Mileena. He was just set to aim it when a mall cop came and ran him over with his segway.

"PUT DAT DERE WEPPUN DAOWN!" The fat, stereotypical mall cop said in a thick countreh aksant. He was the redneck version of Paul Blart.

Scorpion got up off the floor, sword in hand and sliced the cop diagonally in half. He pushed the corpse off the segway and got on.

"How do you work this thing?" Scorpion asked himself as he rolled around, trying to use it. He wiggled around a bit before driving straight into the glass exterior of a nearby store. He broke through the glass and fell of the segway.

Mileena was just getting up from her fall, suffering a bad headache.

"Grrr....time to die!" She said with insanity. She bolted over to the store and jumped onto Scorpion. She began to bite on his neck and he tried to push her off.

"GET OFF ME YOU WHORE!" Scorpion yelled, punching her in the head. Luckily for him, his neck was protected by his leather mask, so it wasn't harmed. He managed to throw her off after a minor struggle, and grabbed the segway by the handlebars.

He got up and slung the segway overhead like a sack o taters, bashing Mileena in the head. He began punching her in the face relentlessly, trying to knock her out. He knocked her down after a few punches, grabbed her foot, and ripped her boot off.

"TAKE THIS, YOU STUPID UGLY ABOMINATION!" he screamed as he began to beat her down with her own boot, similar to what Quan Chi does in his leg beat fatality.

"YOU PIECE OF SHIT! DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE!"

All the while, Mileena was screaming, sounding like a type of mentally handicapped cat.

Scorpion went in for the kill as he stabbed the hooker heels into Mileena's head. Finally, he was free from this idiotic slut, this horrible excuse for a character.

But his rage propelled him to kick her corpse repeatedly for 10 minutes as bystanders watched in serious confusion. Once he calmed down, he noticed what he was looking for the whole time- a map. It was the best luck he had all day, he found a map of the city folded up on a shelf. He was at the right place at the right time.

"YYYEEEEESSSSSSSS!" Scorpion shouted in pure excitement. He grabbed the map without hesitation and ripped the plastic wrapping off of it.

He opened it up and began examining it, searching for the museum.

"AHA! There it is!" he said as he found his destination. It was a few miles away from where he was, but he was glad to know that he had finally found its location.

He sprinted out of the store, nut pain gone. He went into the parking lot and hopped into the shitty PT Cruiser he was driving. He backed out and sped away.
 
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The thought of Scorpion on a goddam segway is pure genius :rofl:

Also, nice to see that Merlin































































































The Wizard made a sweet ass cameo :cool:
 
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