Kryptonite
New member
You can view the full article Here: http://www.sexuality.org/l/sex/mywtllaf.html Enjoy and don't forget to bust a nut or two on your face 
One of the most powerful memes, or repeated messages of both religion and advertising is, "You are incomplete and you need another person." So, very early in life, we are cast off from ourselves and embark on an endless quest of finding the perfect other. And it turns out to be a pretty hopeless search for most people, wrought with endless pain and loss, which ferments into resentment and hatred. You will not find anyone outside yourself until you have found you deep within yourself. Our culture pushes the idea of monogamy, but we forget that "mono" means ONE. You are the one.
Mirror masturbation is a confrontation with your essential self, your uncluttered beauty and your most real sexuality. This is the basic exercise in authentic self-expression. It may seem shameful at first, and you may be repulsed by the idea. You may think, "Why would I want to do that?" or immediately conclude that it's stupid or disgusting; you may feel a shot of fear course through your body, perhaps the fear that you'll get caught, or that someone else will know. Or you may be thrilled at the prospect of such an adventure.
Masturbation is about being your own lover, and mirror masturbation is a very direct and obvious way to experience this.
"As soon as I start touching me, this face changes," my friend Maria wrote to me yesterday. "There is my lover looking at me. It is Him, Her. I feel myself being very soft, feeling what I feel, slowly, deep. No pressure, no force, no fear. Nothing but listening and watching. And I know I am in love with my soul, eyes, my face, the warmth of my body. I am becoming my own lover. I have found my way back home."
The fact that so many people are repulsed or would never dare to talk or think about masturbating passionately and lovingly in front of a mirror is an indication of its power. The veil is shame. Shame is powerful; it is a door. Where you feel embarrassment, you are holding back energy, and you will release your strength as you do. Shame is the map to your strength.
Go through the door and find out what is on the other side. In any aspect of sexuality, the stronger the shame, the more pleasure and power it conceals. Sexual shame conceals a deeper shame of being alive. Often a great well of guilt is veiled as "a little guilt," and I suggest you explore this possibility. If you have any lingering traces of resistance or guilt around your existence, here is where you'll uncover them, and where you're likely to let them go - in front of a mirror.
Some people suffering from self-hatred in the form of "body image" issues, like not being good-looking enough, feeling overweight, awkward or otherwise unsexy, are likely to resist the most strongly, and, by no coincidence, find the greatest relief and healing.
We are taught that our self-image is something we put on. I would propose it's something that's far better taken off. All the bullshit loaded on us by religion and advertising and ex-lovers about how ugly we are can drop off like silk. You will feel better for doing this. Your life will change.
You'll need two mirrors, a little one to get a close-up look at what your genitals and face look like in a state of ecstasy, and a larger one for the full body view. Sex books and Our Bodies, Our Selves have been recommending the make-up mirror routine to women forever, but largely as an anatomical exercise; finally, in Sex for One, masturbation pioneer Betty Dodson turned it into an artistic experience of seeing how beautiful your genitals are.
The large mirror is best floor-length, and better if it's wide enough to see your feet. You need to be close enough to make clear eye contact with yourself. I suggest something that touches the floor, and can be angled; then sit on the floor, where you have room to spread out. However, any mirror will do.
The idea is not just to see what you look like masturbating, but rather to see what you look like feeling what you're feeling, and to witness the beauty of this. Stay with you. Remain aware. At times masturbating in front of mirrors, I have barely recognized the sight of my own face, and seen many expressions for the first time. These are not the faces I put on for the world; I have had to get used to what I really looked like in a state of openness and release rather than in "personality mode."I have seen in my own eyes the expression of loneliness and sexual deprivation, and watched it melt away as I drew closer to myself. In one experience, green spirals shot between my eyes and the reflection of my eyes as I went into my orgasm.
I suggest you watch yourself undress, exploring the visual impression of your body, and witness your physical responses as you get turned on; watch as you explore your pleasure, and dare to explore yourself a little deeper. As you witness this, tune into the feeling of compassion for yourself. There is a lot of passion in compassion, and this is where you will find it. Move into a safe space of total love and acceptance of yourself; it's easy; brush away the veils; see yourself beautiful. You are.
Feel your erotic self. Then watch yourself fuck yourself, taste yourself, scream in pleasure or whatever it is that turns you on. Then, I suggest you watch as you completely surrender to the experience and your orgasm looking directly into your eyes. This is difficult at first for some people; if you find that it is, keep practicing and you'll get it.
The idea is to literally come into yourself. Fill your entire consciousness with yourself; come, become, and be free.
These experiences will begin to make a lasting visual and emotional impression on your psyche, and you will start to see yourself differently and exist more comfortably and naturally. You will breathe more naturally within your own being. You will become more comfortable with change. Ecstasy means ex-stasis, or freedom from being stuck. We need this desperately. As you leave behind your guilt and shame about self-love, you will begin to let go of all other kinds of psychological resistances to who you are. You will start to feel who you are, and who you are is strong and wonderful. Keep experimenting. You might want to keep a diary of your trip into yourself.
One of the most powerful memes, or repeated messages of both religion and advertising is, "You are incomplete and you need another person." So, very early in life, we are cast off from ourselves and embark on an endless quest of finding the perfect other. And it turns out to be a pretty hopeless search for most people, wrought with endless pain and loss, which ferments into resentment and hatred. You will not find anyone outside yourself until you have found you deep within yourself. Our culture pushes the idea of monogamy, but we forget that "mono" means ONE. You are the one.
Mirror masturbation is a confrontation with your essential self, your uncluttered beauty and your most real sexuality. This is the basic exercise in authentic self-expression. It may seem shameful at first, and you may be repulsed by the idea. You may think, "Why would I want to do that?" or immediately conclude that it's stupid or disgusting; you may feel a shot of fear course through your body, perhaps the fear that you'll get caught, or that someone else will know. Or you may be thrilled at the prospect of such an adventure.
Masturbation is about being your own lover, and mirror masturbation is a very direct and obvious way to experience this.
"As soon as I start touching me, this face changes," my friend Maria wrote to me yesterday. "There is my lover looking at me. It is Him, Her. I feel myself being very soft, feeling what I feel, slowly, deep. No pressure, no force, no fear. Nothing but listening and watching. And I know I am in love with my soul, eyes, my face, the warmth of my body. I am becoming my own lover. I have found my way back home."
The fact that so many people are repulsed or would never dare to talk or think about masturbating passionately and lovingly in front of a mirror is an indication of its power. The veil is shame. Shame is powerful; it is a door. Where you feel embarrassment, you are holding back energy, and you will release your strength as you do. Shame is the map to your strength.
Go through the door and find out what is on the other side. In any aspect of sexuality, the stronger the shame, the more pleasure and power it conceals. Sexual shame conceals a deeper shame of being alive. Often a great well of guilt is veiled as "a little guilt," and I suggest you explore this possibility. If you have any lingering traces of resistance or guilt around your existence, here is where you'll uncover them, and where you're likely to let them go - in front of a mirror.
Some people suffering from self-hatred in the form of "body image" issues, like not being good-looking enough, feeling overweight, awkward or otherwise unsexy, are likely to resist the most strongly, and, by no coincidence, find the greatest relief and healing.
We are taught that our self-image is something we put on. I would propose it's something that's far better taken off. All the bullshit loaded on us by religion and advertising and ex-lovers about how ugly we are can drop off like silk. You will feel better for doing this. Your life will change.
You'll need two mirrors, a little one to get a close-up look at what your genitals and face look like in a state of ecstasy, and a larger one for the full body view. Sex books and Our Bodies, Our Selves have been recommending the make-up mirror routine to women forever, but largely as an anatomical exercise; finally, in Sex for One, masturbation pioneer Betty Dodson turned it into an artistic experience of seeing how beautiful your genitals are.
The large mirror is best floor-length, and better if it's wide enough to see your feet. You need to be close enough to make clear eye contact with yourself. I suggest something that touches the floor, and can be angled; then sit on the floor, where you have room to spread out. However, any mirror will do.
The idea is not just to see what you look like masturbating, but rather to see what you look like feeling what you're feeling, and to witness the beauty of this. Stay with you. Remain aware. At times masturbating in front of mirrors, I have barely recognized the sight of my own face, and seen many expressions for the first time. These are not the faces I put on for the world; I have had to get used to what I really looked like in a state of openness and release rather than in "personality mode."I have seen in my own eyes the expression of loneliness and sexual deprivation, and watched it melt away as I drew closer to myself. In one experience, green spirals shot between my eyes and the reflection of my eyes as I went into my orgasm.
I suggest you watch yourself undress, exploring the visual impression of your body, and witness your physical responses as you get turned on; watch as you explore your pleasure, and dare to explore yourself a little deeper. As you witness this, tune into the feeling of compassion for yourself. There is a lot of passion in compassion, and this is where you will find it. Move into a safe space of total love and acceptance of yourself; it's easy; brush away the veils; see yourself beautiful. You are.
Feel your erotic self. Then watch yourself fuck yourself, taste yourself, scream in pleasure or whatever it is that turns you on. Then, I suggest you watch as you completely surrender to the experience and your orgasm looking directly into your eyes. This is difficult at first for some people; if you find that it is, keep practicing and you'll get it.
The idea is to literally come into yourself. Fill your entire consciousness with yourself; come, become, and be free.
These experiences will begin to make a lasting visual and emotional impression on your psyche, and you will start to see yourself differently and exist more comfortably and naturally. You will breathe more naturally within your own being. You will become more comfortable with change. Ecstasy means ex-stasis, or freedom from being stuck. We need this desperately. As you leave behind your guilt and shame about self-love, you will begin to let go of all other kinds of psychological resistances to who you are. You will start to feel who you are, and who you are is strong and wonderful. Keep experimenting. You might want to keep a diary of your trip into yourself.
