My Life for a Smile: An MLP Fanfic


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Yep. That's right. I've realized over the past while that the ending to ME3 killed any inspiration I had to write for that franchise, and broken d-pads have kept me away from MK and removed inspiration for that project... So I came up with this. Something I truly enjoy writing and doesn't feel like forced work. So... yeah. This is a quasi-SI fic told in the first person, primarily inspired by my suicidal tendencies about a month ago. Enjoy!



My legs dangled over the water, buffeted ever so slightly by the soft breeze rolling in off the coast. I gazed longingly at the stars above, admiring the peaceful tranquility that permeated the atmosphere. There were no cars, no people, not a single sign of humanity aside from myself and the rusty old bridge spanning the river. Nothing to fracture the picturesque serenity surrounding me.

If only it could be like this more often...

I sighed as I stared up at the moon. It shone brightly this night, oddly so one might even say. Whatever the cause, it made for a stunning display. Silver moonlight reflected off the gently flowing current below, imbuing the darkened waters with a glowing silver tint. Ripples across the surface flared brightly as rays of moonlight reflected every which way.

Maybe things could’ve been different...

The river had always been sacred to me, it seemed only fitting that I make my way here tonight. Once more I glanced up towards the blackened skies, the corners of my mouth pulling upwards into the faintest of smiles as the stars winked their approval.

I suppose it’s time then...

I made a slight push forward and slipped over the edge, laying my body to rest within the comforting embrace of the waves.


The wave of magic blasted through the sky. It didn’t last long however, as the remnants of the spell quickly dissipated into the world below. The last remnants of the powerful magic broke apart on the Equestrian border, too far from the capital to be detected by the alicorn sisters that ruled the lands. Not all spellcasters of note however, had wings, and in the rural village of Ponyville, one particular unicorn bolted awake. Had this particular mare been anyone else, the shockwave would have gone unnoticed, but as fate would have it, this lavender pony was no ordinary mare. A spellcaster of the highest degree, Twilight Sparkle was the element of magic incarnate, and the personal student of Celestia herself. Faint as it was, Twilight was too attuned to her element to not detect the spell, and with a lurch, jolted awake.

“Spike!” She whispered. “Wake up!” She waited a moment, and upon seeing no reaction, levitated a small purple dragon out of the mess of blankets on top of her bed, promptly dropping him over the side.

With a groan, the baby dragon pulled himself up from the foot of her bed.

“What now, Twilight?” the dragon complained, clutching the top of his head.

“Did you feel that?” Twilight asked.

“No,” he quickly answered. “You’re probably just hungry again. I told you not to skip dinner.” He yawned. “Can I go back to bed now?”

“That wasn’t me!” Twilight argued. “It was magic! It felt like the remnants of a spell... a powerful spell. And no, you can’t go back to bed,” she added, noting the dragon’s attempt to climb back under his blankets.

“Oh give it a rest Twilight,” the dragon moaned. “You probably just drank too much coffee. Or maybe Luna did something fancy tonight. I’m sure it’s nothing to get worried about... or worth interrupting my sleep over.”

“Raising the moon and decorating the night is Luna’s specialty, an innate ability present only in the body of an alicorn. It wouldn’t release magic like that, certainly not enough to be felt all the way over here in Ponyville.” Twilight, paused, deep in thought. “In fact, it almost felt like it came from across the southern border.”

The southern border of Equestria lay on the face of a large cliff. The lands beyond were unclaimed territory, but nopony had ever showed any interest in expansion. Nothing but wasteland rested beyond that line, the endless sands inhabited only by fierce monsters and the toughest of plants. Certainly nothing capable of producing such a tremendous display of magical power. Unless... No, they couldn’t. Even they wouldn’t make their home in such a barren place... would they?

“What do you think, Spike?” Twilight asked. “Spike?”

The mare looked down and sighed. The purple and green dragon hatchling was already fast asleep on the floor. She decided to let him sleep. The unexplained burst of magic was hardly a pressing issue, and certainly didn’t need to be solved tonight.

I could probably use some sleep as well, Twilight thought to herself. Suddenly, a low rumble echoed throughout the room.

...And maybe a little snack as well, she thought with a faint blush.


She felt their pain. She suffered the effects of the malnourishment that afflicted each and every one of of her subjects. A distant throbbing, growing stronger with each passing moment. It was both a curse and a blessing, one that stemmed from her position amongst her people. When they thrived, she had the power of a goddess, but when they grew weak... It would not be long before she was unfit for even the simplest of her duties. Her nation was falling apart at the seams and soon she would be unable to halt the descent.

She was no fool. She was the catalyst of her peoples situation, the harbinger of their plight. She had set forth with the noblest of intentions of course, but that hardly mattered when your people lived in agony all about you. It was her desperate plot that prompted this agony, her inability to let go of the past that doomed a once prosperous civilization. Now, it was her responsibility to fix things once more.

She stood up to inspect her handiwork, admiring the delicately carved rune surrounding her. At a glance, it would appear to be a simple invocation rune, the catalyst for a basic summoning spell. Upon closer inspection however, previously hidden details would be revealed, unveiling the blueprints for one of the most complicated summoning rituals to grace the modern era of spellcasting. This glyph, handcrafted over a period of weeks would break all the barriers of reality to retrieve exactly what was needed.

She was no fool. She knew now what was necessary, but she also knew that neither she nor her people could take the steps required for success. Her people were weak from hunger, unfit to carry out the mission that would save them.

And it’s doubtful I could even make it to the border without being attacked.

Dangerous as it might be, this was the only way to save her people. The only way to atone for her mistakes.

With her twisted horning flaring brightly, Chrysalis stepped into the circle.

… And somewhere far away, an oddly iridescent moon flashed green.


Anyway, the first four chapters are already written, so I'll be updating those about once every day or so. After that, chapters will come as their written. As always, comments are appreciated, but you're enjoyment is reward enough. Thanks you for reading.

Also, I'm aware that this isn't as good as it could be. I'm just getting it all down on paper (so to speak) at the moment, and will rewrite a large chunk of the story at a later date.
My eyes fluttered open, greeted pleasantly by a soft green glow. For several seconds, I entertained the thought that I might truly have awoken to an afterlife. A rapidly growing ache throughout my entire body quickly dispelled that notion.

“Why am I not dead?” I asked myself with a groan, still shaking off the drowsiness.

“Because I need you alive,” a feminine and startlingly familiar voice responded.

I jerked at the unexpected response, searching for the source of the noise. My eyes were now fully open, but the green glow I awoke to stretched no farther than half a meter in any direction. Anything beyond was shrouded in shadow. I wasn’t particularly nervous; I had been in the process of suicide after all. I was just rather curious towards the identity of who I supposed was my savior.

“Can you not see, little foal?” the voice inquired.

“Not particularly well,” I replied. Wait, was I just called a foal? “Human eyes don’t lend themselves to night vision particularly well.”

“Human?” the voice laughed. “Is that what you call yourself?”

“Isn’t that we all call ourselves?” I inquired. A feeling of dread was starting to settle over my stomach... or at least what I thought was my stomach. Everything felt different, and I couldn’t get the words ‘Little Foal’ out of my head.

She laughed again, and I felt a chill roll up my spine. “There might have been a time, little foal, when that was true... but no longer.” With a sudden flash of green fire, an old mirror materialized before me. “Examine your frame, little foal, and tell me what you see.”

The reflective panel of the old mirror was in terrible condition, cracked and covered in a thin layer of dust and much. Nonetheless, it did the job. Because, no matter how bad the quality of the reflection, it was painfully obvious that that the black four legged being staring back at me was anything but human. In fact, I knew exactly what it was, and it was something that should’ve remained perfectly non-existent. I, once a suicidal human, was now a changeling. By this stage, normal person would likely have begun panicking, or entered a state of denial that would take many hours of therapy to be coaxed out of. But depression, horrible as it might be, does wonders towards allowing you to accept change... Especially dramatic, reality-shifting, ‘tossed through the different planes of reality into the wondrous land of Equestria’ changes such as this one. To be honest, I was starting to become a little giddy.

I took the time to examine my new body, make sure everything was as I remembered it. At first, everything seemed accurate, but upon closer inspection, I started noticing certain... discrepancies. My black exoskeleton, which should’ve been pockmarked with strange holes, was clear of blemishes, and possessed a polished sheen that I did not remember changelings possessing. My wings, though they retained their insectoid appearance, were coloured a luminescent silver and also lacked the normally present holes. My horn looked like a slightly curving blade, a bit like a scimitar actually. Maybe I could cut things with it. I also possessed a pine-green mane-type-thingie and tail that were once again immaculate, and green eyes that actually looked like eyes. To be honest, my appearance was like that of a smaller, more refined, male version of the Changeling Queen herself.

Chrysalis... The realization of just who was speaking with me hit me like... well nothing. It just sort of occurred to me through the rapidly fading emotional high I was experiencing. Suddenly, my whole situation seemed much less appealing. Chrysalis was supposed to be evil, and if she was talking to me, then she probably wanted me to do something horrible, like punch Fluttershy. If I refused to follow her demands she’d probably send me back to my ed up life on Earth, and then I’d probably have to find a cliff to jump off near... well, where ever I was now. It made sense that even in a relatively peaceful utopia such as this, I’d still be getting screwed over. After all, I already blew my first life. Why break a friggin streak? The sound of approaching hoofsteps managed to snap me out my sudden emotional downturn, and I looked up into the eyes of the Changeling Queen herself.

Her appearance shocked me. In the show, while her appearance might have been strange, she had at still possessed an aura of grace and power gave her the same regal air that any other form of royalty possessed. Now though, she just looked... tired. Her body was in even worse shape than it had been in the cartoon, hooves pockmarked with even more holes, and wings almost dissolved. There has to be a reason for that, I thought, curiosity once again beating back depression. How can I look so polished, and yet the queen herself so rundown?

My musing was cut short however, as Chrysalis began to speak. “You’re not scared,” the changeling stated simply.

“Why would I be?” I asked in reply. A thousand possible reasons were already running through my head, I wasn’t an idiot after all. But I wanted to hear what she thought. Would probably give me an idea on just where I could expect this conversation to go.

“I yanked you from your home, from your world. Away from your friends and family. You should be terrified.”

I pondered her answer for about three seconds before bursting into a fit of laughter.

Something you should know about me is that while I laugh at funny things, like any other human being, or pony as it might soon be, I laugh harder at people's suffering. More specifically, my own suffering. Only my own suffering, really. It’s a coping mechanism, one that allows me to off depression as a source of amusement. It doesn’t work, as my prior attempts at suicide may have suggested, but it’s a trait that’s stuck nonetheless. Of course, the queen of the changelings did not know that, making this whole situation more than a little awkward.

Her horn flared a dangerous green, and she smashed her front two hooves onto the ground with a thunderous roar. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t more than a little intimidated by the sight. When she spoke, her voice was dangerously low. “Pray tell what it is that amuses you, human. I don’t wish to regret summoning you here.”

I was silent for a few moments, carefully planning my next few words. This was obviously unstable territory, and something told me that angering Chrysalis would end any thoughts of a better future I had just created. “My apologies your highness. It was the fault of my twisted sense of humour, and entirely unrelated to yourself.” God, I really hope I’m not overdoing it. “It’s just, when you... summoned me here, I was sort of in the process of killing myself. Home, friends, family... I haven’t had any of that for that past three years.” Yep, totally overdid it. Goodbye ponyland, it’s been fun. Time to die again. I closed my eyes.

After several seconds of not being dead, I opened my eyes back up, expecting to see a fierce scowl and approaching lightning bolt. Instead what I got was the faintest expression of... sadness? What?

“I can empathize with your situation,” Chrysalis stated softly. I didn’t even have a chance to formulate a response before I was wrapped in a sudden, and completely unexpected hug.
I am conflicted. I just cannot bring myself to read this story because MLP fanfics bore me, but at the same time I refuse to allow such effort to go unnoticed. Go post this on Equestria Daily.
I am conflicted. I just cannot bring myself to read this story because MLP fanfics bore me, but at the same time I refuse to allow such effort to go unnoticed. Go post this on Equestria Daily.

I have it on FimFiction, but I'm quite certain that SI type stories are banned on Equestria Daily.
What is SI?

Self Insert. Basically, you're inserting yourself into the universe involved and writing about your "experiences." They're usually told in the first person perspective, and Equestria Daily had so many bad ones submitted that they just banned the type of story all together.
Are you serious?
What about My Little Dashie?

They didn't remove the ones already up there, and My Little Dashie isn't that type of SI anyway. SI's are when the authour is basically sent to Equestria to go on all sorts of adventures. Who knows, I could also be full of shit but I'm quite certain that SI's are banned.
I stood there limply, mind still trying to comprehend exactly what was occurring. I was being hugged by Chrysalis, queen of the changelings, for reasons I was still unsure of. I was tempted to broach the subject, but memories of our misunderstanding naught but a few minutes ago remained fresh in my mind, and I decided to pass on the subject. If my current predicament was any indication, I think I might have smoothed things over. Maybe. I was still kinda getting some mixed signals over here but I’d be blatantly lying if I said I wanted it to end. Awkward as it might’ve been, it’s been a long time since anybody, err... Anypony? Anyling? Beside the point I suppose. Anyway, it’s been a long time since I’ve been held like this, and dangerous shapeshifter queen or not, it was still quite comforting.

At first I was suspicious that she might been feeding on my emotions, or some other such dastardly deed, but I didn’t feel like my soul was being sucked out or anything, so I suppose it didn’t matter. Possibly compromising position or not, there still wasn’t a whole lot of trust being flung between us, so betrayal wouldn’t exactly come as a shock if it could even be called such. When we finally broke apart, I almost released a sigh of disappointment. Almost. Fortunately I managed to withhold the noise, preventing at the very least another awkward conversation, and possibly several other less than desirable outcomes.

Of course, Chrysalis was quick to spoil the mood for the evening, or morning, or whatever time it was. “If you tell anypony, human, or changeling about that incident,” Chrysalis began, “I’ll kill you. That was a strictly professional gesture, made with the sole intention of calming the whirlwind of emotions running amok in your mind.”

“Err... Thank you?” I cautiously replied. With the threat of agony looming above the horizon, I figured caution was the best course of action.

Chrysalis of course, ignored me, instead turning and trotting back off into the cave system. She paused for a second, looking back just long enough to call out “follow.” The cave illuminated itself as she exited, wall-mounted torches appearing to light themselves as she walked by.

Well... It's not like I have plans, I thought to myself. I attempted to step forward, only to come crashing back down to the stone floor, legs splayed every which way. Suitably embarrassed in front of royalty, I attempted to climb back up to my feet, err... hooves, only to come crashing down again. Apparently Chrysalis noticed my rather unfortunate situation as she was once again standing before me before I could make my third attempt to climb back to my feet.

“I uhh... don’t suppose I could get a little help here?” I ask nervously.

I heard her mutter something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like an insult and thought about protesting, but immediately fell silent upon seeing her brightly lit horn only centimeters from my face. Suddenly, a small bolt leaped from her horn to mine, bestowing upon me a quick and uncomfortable jolt of electrical shock. I attempted to scramble backwards, only to be held in place by a green aura that very suddenly wrapped itself around me. I’m ashamed to say that I may or may not have panicked at the time and imagined the slight shock as the strike of a lightning bolt. Hey! It’s been a confusing day, and I’ve been getting a lot of seriously mixed signals.

Once I realized that I had not in fact been blasted with inclement weather, my mind calmed down rather quickly, and the green field around me dissipated, allowing me to climb back to my hooves and follow in the direction that Chrysalis had already left in. I noticed these implications immediately of course, but refrained from making any exclamations of awe or any other such form of surprise. I’d already made fool enough of myself with the whole ‘unable to walk’ incident and just chalked my newfound abilities up to magic. Awesome stuff that magic; really saves a lot of unnecessary trouble. I took the opportunity to test out my wings and horn as well, and while I was ecstatic to find my wings working fine, silently too I might add, magic had apparently decided me unworthy of bearing its power. I’m serious. I didn’t even get a fizzle.

I was about to make a second attempt when Chrysalis decided to intervene. “If you would please follow me, little human, we can experiment with your new form at a later time.” Her voice sounded almost sweet during that sentence, and as such, left me quite thoroughly terrified. I’d already come to the conclusion that harsh meant good, and fake niceties meant bad, and I could now add the word human to the list of signs to watch out for. I figured that knowing what kind of mood the queen was in would probably make future dealings much easier, if there ever were any. As it was though, I promptly placed myself back on the ground and resumed walking.

Chrysalis was definitely a master of manipulation; already she was dictating the path of my emotions. I mean, I had expected it given her species primary method of feeding, but it still came as a shock to see just how terrifyingly effective she was. She could probably leave me a broken and gibbering mess on the floor, drained of all emotion if she so wished. Or she could just blast me with lighting... That’d be even worse!

With newly formed thoughts of brutal dismemberment by lightning filling my thoughts, I didn’t even notice that the changeling queen I was following had come to a stop. Naturally, I walked right into her. The changeling queen stumbled for a moment, but quickly re-stabilized herself and shot a deathly glare my way. If looks could kill, then I’d probably have been struck by lightning twice by now, maybe even thrice.

Okay, definitely need to work on first impressions, I thought to myself, glancing back up the changeling who was still glaring at me. I felt a fourth bolt of electricity strike the philosophical lightning rod that was myself. And she needs to be more understanding. People and ponies alike should understand by now that when you stop in the middle of the road... Wait we stopped? If my body hadn’t been covered in a black chitinous exoskeleton incapable of exposing the blood rushing to my face, I might have blushed at how long it took for that thought to occur to me. Of course, now I wanted to know why we stopped.

“Your highness?” I inquired tentatively.

“Don’t call me your highness,” Chrysalis snapped back. “That is a respect owed only by my subjects.”

Okay, so I’m not one of her subjects... Wait, is that good or bad? I’ll worry about that later I suppose.

“Okay then... Chrysalis.” I waited to see if she would protest again, and when it seemed she would not, continued. “Could you uhh... please tell me why we’ve stopped?” Please don’t zap me.

For a moment, she just stared at me. Then raise a foreleg and pointed her hoof at the ceiling, or more accurately, the gaping hole where ceiling used to be present. “We’re going up there,” she explained. “You can fly, correct little foal?”

Okay, I’m ‘little foal’ again... That’s a good sign. I can finally appear somewhat competent now, too, I thought with a little mental smirk, my hooves slowly lifting off the ground. Whatever Chrysalis had done with that little magic burst of hers before, it had apparently taught me the basics of flying as well as walking. I mean, I wasn’t exactly brilliant, but at least I could control myself.

“Yep,” I stated, a little too eagerly, as I flew off towards the indicated exit.

I actually made it to the hole without incident, and suddenly noticed the sunlight streaming out of it. Either my vision was seriously impaired recently, or the sun gets raised over an incredibly brief period of time, because I could swear this thing was dark when I took off. Actually, given the nature of the sun's motion, it’s quite possible that it just jumped into place. Magic tended to enjoy spitting in the face of logic like that. I shrugged my wings (For some reason, I felt an incredible surge of jealousy hit me from what could only be described as some far off plane of existence, along with strange thoughts regarding computer firewalls. I still haven't figured that one out) and flew through the open exit. What I saw took my breath away.

“Dear Princess Celestia...”

“Is this really necessary Twilight?” Spike asked from across the room.

“Of course it is!” Twilight almost shouted. “Equestria could be in grave danger! For all we know, a tide of destruction could already be heading our way! Who knows what kind of foul magic they changelings could have used?”

“Twilight,” Spike began calmly, aware of the standard procedure for calming the panicked mare. “Do we even know if it was bad magic?”

“Of course it was!” Twilight exclaimed. “It was probably cast by Chrysalis herself.”

Undeterred, Spike continued his line of questioning. “Do we even know it was the changelings?”

Twilight paused for a moment, feeling her arguments slipping through her hooves. “Err... No, but it came from the south! Who else could it have been?”

“I don’t know Twilight... What else could possibly live in the completely uncharted wasteland that stretches who knows how far past the southern border of Equestria?”

“Oh...” Twilight felt a faint blush rise to her cheeks. “I suppose when you put it that way, I might have overreacted... just a little.”

“Yeah. A little,” Spike grumbled.

“But,” Twilight continued, ignoring the dragon, “I still need to send a letter to the princess’. Even if there was no malevolent intent, a burst of magic that powerful still warrants investigation.”

“Okay Twi,” Spike surrendered, “but no panicking this time around!”

“Of course not. Now take note!” Twilight recited her letter. “Dear Princess Celestia, I have recently detected a powerful surge of magic originating from beyond the southern border. While I didn not identify any malevolent energies-”

“Umm... Malevolent?”

Twilight sighed, and spelled the offending word aloud for the dragon. “M, A, L, E, V, O, L, E, N, T...” She waited for him to finish writing it down, before continuing. “But I still believe it worth investigating. Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle.” She gave Spike a nod and the letter vanished a in a burst of green fire, en route to the Equestrian capital.

Both were silent for a few seconds before Spike asked, “Now what?”

“I’m going to do some studying,” Twilight informed the dragon. “Looking for information on other races that might be capable of using magic and see if I can’t figure out what type of spell might have been used.”

“Well I’m off to Rarity’s!” Spike chirped excitedly. “We’re going gem hunting. Good luck with your research Twi!”

“Be careful,” Twilight warned the dragon.

“Yeah yeah, I know.” With that, the dragon exited the library and shut the door, leaving Twilight alone with only her books and thoughts for company. Naturally, the lavender unicorn wasted no time in beginning her research. Enshrouding a book in a magical aura, she pulled the tome of its shelf and opened it up.

“Magical Entities of Ancient History,” Twilight read aloud. “This looks promising.”
I'll read this story because you wrote it :love:

Yes! Victory has been acquired!

Here. Have a chapter!


Have you ever experienced a transition so sudden, and so utterly stunning that the very sight left you breathless? Have you ever crested a desolate rocky hill only to be greeted by a picturesque tableau so beautiful that it doesn’t seem real? Because that’s a pretty accurate depiction of my first experience outside the changeling hive.

As I exited the darkened tunnel system, I was assaulted by sunlight, temporarily blinded by the illuminating rays. But when my eyes finally cleared... well needless to say, the sight was rather breathtaking. Stretching out before me was a vast stone canyon, large enough to give the Grand Canyon of Arizona a run for its money. Natural rock formations, in sizes seen only in fantasy, connected the different ends of the canyon, like an endless network of stone bridges. Sunlight reflected and refracted off the various gems embedded within the stone, creating a dazzling cascade of colours that painted the entire expanse in a shimmering and endlessly changing rainbow.

“It seems almost alive, doesn’t it?” the voice of the changeling queen asked from behind me.

“Yeah,” I answered back half heartedly, still entranced by the magnificent display.

Chrysalis continued. “The graceful stonework, the windswept ridges, the shimmering colours...”

“It’s amazing...”

“It’s also the most hated sight in all the Changeling nation,” the queen finished.

“Yeah... Wait, what?”

“This entire region is a lie... It’s all dead,” Chrysalis explained with a snort. “Completely incapable of supporting life. For all its beauty and splendor, not a single creature can make its home here.”

“But... You did,” I stammered, trying to come to terms with the sudden shift in the conversation. “The entire changeling race lives here, doesn’t it?”

“Live?” Chrysalis asked me incredulously. “Nothing can live in this wasteland. We survive... no, not even that. We starve here, and every time a changeling gazes upon this forsaken hole, it mocks them. It shows us just what they can’t have...”

There’s a silence between us for a few minutes after that. The conversation has left me in another depressive fit, and I’m hardly suited for a discussion. As for Chrysalis... Well I imagine she’s preparing her big speech on how she’s going to save her species from the brink of destruction and bring about a golden age for all of changeling kind, or wreak vengeance on those that wronged her nation, or some other dramatic thing like that.

The silence is finally broken when Chrysalis decides to continue from where she left off. “It shows us just what we can’t have,” the changeling queen repeats... “And just how I’ve failed to provide it.”

Or it could be that.

Huh. An admission of failure certainly hadn’t been on the top of my list of expectations, in fact, it hadn’t even made the list at all. I figured that given how she was portrayed in the show, Chrysalis would’ve given herself a bit more credit. Acted a bit more superior or something. Of course, re-running through my prior thought process from before, I came to the sudden realization that I was attempting to define her character by using information gained from a whole twenty minutes of television. Because, you know, I’m an idiot like that sometimes. If I wasn’t in the presence of royalty, I’d facepalm, err... hoof.

My curiosity sufficiently piqued, I felt the wave of depression ebb away as quick as it flowed in. I already knew what was coming next of course. Given the nature of the changeling queen’s last statement, it’s wasn’t exactly hard to predict, and with the brighter and occasionally insane part of my mind becoming dominant for the moment, I was tempted to leap into the air and shout ‘STORY TIME!’ I didn’t actually do that, of course. I mean, I’m not that crazy, but it’s the thought that counts, right?


And I’m rambling again. This tends to happen when I get excited, which I’ve noticed is happening a lot more in the brightly coloured universe I’m currently occupying. Point is, it became quite clear the Chrysalis was about to start explaining a great many things. There would probably be a substantial amount of information that went unsaid in canon, but more importantly, it would probably lead to me finding out exactly why I’m now a hole-less changeling instead of a human. Regardless of how much I might like my current circumstances, I imagine that the reasoning behind my dimensional interloping is likely an important piece of info.

As it turns out though, Chrysalis wasn’t one for starting stories, as indicated by the succeeding minute of silence following her admission. Evidently, the changeling queen would need a quick nudge to get her started. “So... how exactly have you failed your people?” I groan inwardly after completing the question. I handled that one real friggin’ tactfully, I thought to myself. Fortunately, if the statement irritated her, Chrysalis didn’t show it. Instead, she just started the story.

“Do you know, little foal, how a changeling ruler is appointed?” Chrysalis asked. “I imagine it is quite different then you might imagine. You see, Changeling monarchs are not appointed like those of other races. We do not inherit the crown or vote ourselves into the position. We do not earn it through acts of conquest and campaigns of fear. No, the creation of a changeling leader is a random occurence fueled by raw, uncontained, wild magic. It’s a rare event, and once discovered, the affected changeling is given a crash-course on running a nation by the council, and placed on the throne as soon as possible.”

I took a moment to ponder her words, before coming up with a question. “How can you tell who’s been affected?” I asked the changeling.

For a moment, Chrysalis simply glared at me. Then she asked, “Do I look like an ordinary changeling to you?”

I got the impression that she felt that question stupid, and it really was to be honest. In my defence, I was still sort of giddy.

“Now,” she continued, “I was the most recent changeling to be coronated in this manner. Our species has been fighting a horrible famine for the last hundred years, and I was supposed to be the one to guide us to a brighter future.” She paused, turning her head to gaze at the wasteland surrounding us. “I spent years planning, waiting for an opportunity, any opportunity, to arise. Eventually, one did.”

“The Canterlot wedding,” I realized.

“Yes,” the queen answered. “It was the perfect opportunity... Equestria, from what my infiltrators informed me, was a nation full of emotion, a perfect feeding ground. Everything was planned to the very last detail... Of course it all came crashing down at its culmination. Impersonating a pony so sickeningly sweet, of course somepony would notice the change in personality! I was lucky that nopony noticed sooner!”

Well I always did kind of wonder why Celestia didn’t notice her own nieces abduction and replication a little earlier... “Still, I don’t really see how the state of your people is your fault. I mean, they were already starving before you got the throne, right?”


“It’s not like you killed off the changeling race or anything.” I realized that interrupting her like that was probably a really terrible idea, but it’s always irritated me when people, or changelings in this case, try and take the blame for something that’s not their fault.


“Sure your conquest might have failed, your not any worse off than before, are you?” Again, I was being stupid, but just because she failed to make things better doesn’t mean she made things worse. I mean, I might personally think it was a pretty stupid move to begin with, but she doesn’t have to blame herself for mass starvation. The changelings live in a wasteland for Celestia’s sake!

Are my human expressions already being ponified? Must be a subconscious thing.


“I think that if anything is to blame, it’s circumstance. It’s not like you can...” I stopped, as I saw the changeling queen take a deep breath. “Can...” That’s it, I’m clopped. “Can...” Did I really just use that term? Buck. I might have continued that train of thought, but unfortunately the station was blown over in a very sudden and very painful burst of sonic rage.


Chrysalis must’ve used magic to enhance her voice, because the shockwaves from her scream physically bowled me over. I’m pretty sure I saw several stone pillars crumble in the distance as well.

“You may not be one of my subjects, human, but you are one of my people, and will remain so as long as you exist in this world. You will follow my instructions and you will not deign to disrespect or interrupt me again for the duration of your stay. I might need you, but that does not mean I won’t suck every emotion out of your body and leave you locked up in the hive until the moment of your necessity arises. Do not presume us to be friends, simply because I brought you here. You are here as a tool, a means to an end, and I care not for your input on the situation of my people.”
I shakily picked myself up, wincing. Whether it was from the pain in my head, or the sudden venomous turn in the conversation, I wasn’t quite sure. That last part of her speech though, it had hurt me, because for some insane reason, I had presumed us to be friends. Hah! Friends with Chrysalis... That’d be the day. I mean, it wasn’t entirely my fault - she did give me that hug when we first met, but I still should’ve known better. I guess that, being so close to Equestria and all, I just assumed that everything here would be all lovey-dovey as well. Shows what I know. Seems like I did a real great job everything up.

“Would it help if I apologized?” I asked, somewhat hopefully.

“No,” Chrysalis answered curtly.

Well there goes our semi-amicable relationship... “I’ll just sit here and try not to interrupt you then.”

“That will not be necessary. We’re done for the day. You may wander the hive and take quarters wherever you wish.” She sounded oddly distant now, but surprisingly, or rather, unsurprisingly, I was hardly in the mood to care.

“Of course,” I replied, attempting to cover up the sudden hostility in my voice.

And without another word, the changeling queen disappeared. Literally. She just vanished in a corona of green fire. I wonder if I can do that? I asked myself. Actually, I suppose now is as good a time as any to try and figure magic out. With those plans in mind, I straightened myself out and tried to focus. This would probably be difficult without instruction, but the first unicorns had to have figured it out some way, right?

I would find out later that while ancient unicorns had indeed taught themselves magic, they must also possessed a much higher tolerance for pain. That advantage would be sorely missed within the next few hours.


Elsewhere in the world, an alabaster alicorn slowly lowered her students newest report to the ground, casting a worried glance to the south. The spark of energy Twilight reported was troubling, but there was not much that could be done in regards to it. With little to no information regarding the burst, she had nothing to act on. With a sigh, she levitated a pen off her desk and quickly composed a reply. She would send her sister to meet with Twilight, the royal alicorn resolved.

At the very least, I’ll be able to obtain a more detailed account, and I’m certain that Luna will be overjoyed to visit her new friend.