My Mortal Kombat 10 Story.

I absolutely love it dude, I love how you incorporated the good and evil forces and changed their allegiances according to the events of the game, and it made sense too which was awesome.

If NRS makes MK10's Story Mode based off of this I would not be disappointed one bit.

One thing I wanna point out though, Bo Rai Cho resides in Outworld, not Seido, unless you purposely put him there due to the wars going on in the realms.

Overall, amazing and I would really love to play this story, as it fits with the original timeline, with great twists and turns.

5 STARS! Haha
 
I absolutely love it dude, I love how you incorporated the good and evil forces and changed their allegiances according to the events of the game, and it made sense too which was awesome.

If NRS makes MK10's Story Mode based off of this I would not be disappointed one bit.

One thing I wanna point out though, Bo Rai Cho resides in Outworld, not Seido, unless you purposely put him there due to the wars going on in the realms.

Overall, amazing and I would really love to play this story, as it fits with the original timeline, with great twists and turns.

5 STARS! Haha

He would be one lucky bastard if NRS used it for story mode lol
 
I absolutely love it dude, I love how you incorporated the good and evil forces and changed their allegiances according to the events of the game, and it made sense too which was awesome.

If NRS makes MK10's Story Mode based off of this I would not be disappointed one bit.

One thing I wanna point out though, Bo Rai Cho resides in Outworld, not Seido, unless you purposely put him there due to the wars going on in the realms.

Overall, amazing and I would really love to play this story, as it fits with the original timeline, with great twists and turns.

5 STARS! Haha

Thanks a lot for the feedback Taj, appreciate it a lot. As for Bo Rai Cho, I was aware with him being from Outworld, just thought it would be great to go forward with Johnny Cage's MK9 arcade ending and thus chose Seido. Thanks once again. :)
 
Liu Kang reincarnated as a spectre (and brief bad guy)? Mileena turning a new page to become ruler of Outworld and a peaceful one at that (in other words, turning good)?
That's just a brief of your story. And I love it. Well done.:)
 
Simply amazing.

This is exactly how I would imagine a sequel to MK9 to be like if it were produced by NetherRealm Studios. Your elaborations and fleshing out of details during the events of MK4, simultaneously considering the changes done to the timeline by Raiden are perfectly aligned with NRS' style of story telling. While I have small doubts that some of these characters and story concepts would be incorporated, such as Shujinko (how would they find him?) or Red Dragon's Human-Dragon hybrids, they are very welcomed and you introduce them in a sound manner. The liberties you take with the story, such as Shinnok's shrines and the soul tower granting him even more power, again, simply awesome and very logical. While some people raise doubts that MK11 would be a lot like MK4, which I think your story is (and I don't mean that in a bad way, since MK9 was after all a re-telling of MK1-3 on the most part), I really enjoyed how you fleshed it out and made it MK4 with some minor changes like Liu Kang being destined to defeat Shinnok or Scorpion destined to discover Quan Chi's treachery. The subtle connections to original concepts if very interesting as well; Corrupt Raiden and demonic Lin Kuei cyborgs comes to mind. Making Mileena do a complete flip on her character from MK9 was smart and is cleverly connected with her MK9 arcade ending, though I was of the impression she would be irredeemably evil in this new timeline, I guess there is room otherwise thanks to bother her own arcade ending implying she was in fact influenced by sorcery and Kitana's arcade ending; I'm not sure if this was intentional, but it also seemed that you transformed her character as a reference to how she was originally portrayed before MK9 which is pretty clever as well.

Random things I liked in particular:
- The including of the Red Dragon and Mavado.
- Fuijin becoming Earth's protector as originally intended.
- All the enemy factions created; really brought a sense of dread and sounded overwhelming compared to worn down forces of Light.
- Lin Kuei strategically eliminating world leaders.
- Kano defeating Sonya for a moment in a reverse of irony.
- Everyone had a role in the story.
- Shinnok's role in the story as a cunning, powerful and menacing antagonist makes an impression comparable and unique alongside Shao Kahn.
- Liu Kang's perception being entirely deluded, but is managed to be saved by Nightwolf.
- Liu Kang's fatality on Shinnok.
- All the heroes are wished back by Liu Kang's request.
- Shang Tsung's return; his luck never seems to run out.
- Kano saves Kabal yet again. Guess this implies Kabal is destined to returned to the Black Dragon, isn't he?

I guess the main problem with this is like you said with the chapter format like they did in MK9, but who says it will be like this? MK9 deviated from it when Kung Lao died to Shao Kahn. I imagine a lot of this could still be organised mostly in this manner, though. As for someone else being a host for Onaga, I don't think he will take any form that isn't like his Dragon state we seen in MK: Deception. He is called the "Dragon" king, after all; I believe his design was intentional, even if it deviated from his initial appearance in Raiden's Deadly Alliance ending and will probably stay that way.

This story really makes me want to see you write a fan fiction fleshing out the original timeline and even a sequel to this.

Question: Does your story interpret Noob Saibot's death in MK9 to just be temporary?

Overall, I am immensely impressed.
 
Simply amazing.

This is exactly how I would imagine a sequel to MK9 to be like if it were produced by NetherRealm Studios. Your elaborations and fleshing out of details during the events of MK4, simultaneously considering the changes done to the timeline by Raiden are perfectly aligned with NRS' style of story telling. While I have small doubts that some of these characters and story concepts would be incorporated, such as Shujinko (how would they find him?) or Red Dragon's Human-Dragon hybrids, they are very welcomed and you introduce them in a sound manner. The liberties you take with the story, such as Shinnok's shrines and the soul tower granting him even more power, again, simply awesome and very logical. While some people raise doubts that MK11 would be a lot like MK4, which I think your story is (and I don't mean that in a bad way, since MK9 was after all a re-telling of MK1-3 on the most part), I really enjoyed how you fleshed it out and made it MK4 with some minor changes like Liu Kang being destined to defeat Shinnok or Scorpion destined to discover Quan Chi's treachery. The subtle connections to original concepts if very interesting as well; Corrupt Raiden and demonic Lin Kuei cyborgs comes to mind. Making Mileena do a complete flip on her character from MK9 was smart and is cleverly connected with her MK9 arcade ending, though I was of the impression she would be irredeemably evil in this new timeline, I guess there is room otherwise thanks to bother her own arcade ending implying she was in fact influenced by sorcery and Kitana's arcade ending; I'm not sure if this was intentional, but it also seemed that you transformed her character as a reference to how she was originally portrayed before MK9 which is pretty clever as well.

Random things I liked in particular:
- The including of the Red Dragon and Mavado.
- Fuijin becoming Earth's protector as originally intended.
- All the enemy factions created; really brought a sense of dread and sounded overwhelming compared to worn down forces of Light.
- Lin Kuei strategically eliminating world leaders.
- Kano defeating Sonya for a moment in a reverse of irony.
- Everyone had a role in the story.
- Shinnok's role in the story as a cunning, powerful and menacing antagonist makes an impression comparable and unique alongside Shao Kahn.
- Liu Kang's perception being entirely deluded, but is managed to be saved by Nightwolf.
- Liu Kang's fatality on Shinnok.
- All the heroes are wished back by Liu Kang's request.
- Shang Tsung's return; his luck never seems to run out.
- Kano saves Kabal yet again. Guess this implies Kabal is destined to returned to the Black Dragon, isn't he?

I guess the main problem with this is like you said with the chapter format like they did in MK9, but who says it will be like this? MK9 deviated from it when Kung Lao died to Shao Kahn. I imagine a lot of this could still be organised mostly in this manner, though. As for someone else being a host for Onaga, I don't think he will take any form that isn't like his Dragon state we seen in MK: Deception. He is called the "Dragon" king, after all; I believe his design was intentional, even if it deviated from his initial appearance in Raiden's Deadly Alliance ending and will probably stay that way.

This story really makes me want to see you write a fan fiction fleshing out the original timeline and even a sequel to this.

Question: Does your story interpret Noob Saibot's death in MK9 to just be temporary?

Overall, I am immensely impressed.

Thanks alot for your time and detailed feedback DragnLdy, I really appreciate it. Glad you liked the story overall. As for your queries, starting with Mileena, I liked her portrayal pre-MK9 as a mature and responsible being when she wants to be along with her usual frenzied nature, it bought a nice mix and complexity to her character than how she was portrayed in MK9. Perhaps since she came into conception in the MK1 to MK3 timeline, I guess it it alright then, but going forward I felt it was the natural route to take regarding her character.

For Onaga, after giving it more thought, I agree with you. He would most likely return as how he was depicted in MK:D with perhaps some alternations so as to not make it look lazy.

As for Noob-Saibot's apparent death in MK9, I treated it similar to Scorpion's MK:DA arcade ending, where he was thrown into the soulnado by Moloch and Drahmin only to be saved by the elder gods, but for Noob's case, I put Shinnok as his savior, since he would naturally have a control over soulnado that would have to emerge from somewhere in the Netherealm. I did toy with several other alternatives; such as his soul splitting into two, one being Bi Han and the other being his corrupted self, but I couldnt find much merit in this theory compared to the original one, since something similar had already occurred in the canon and thus stuck with it. Plus I figured it would be better to have Kuai Liang continue as Sub-Zero, though having Bi-Han return would be equally alluring. I initially thought of Kuai Liang remaining as a Cyborg going on a quest to try and reclaim his humanity while pursing as a leader of the Lin Kuei.

What were your impressions on Cyber Sub Zero overall? How would you wish him to return?

As for my other writing ventures, I did actually start a sequel to this (the link is available after the main story) but it unfortunately moves more towards fan-fiction territory with new characters and such. Perhaps when MK10 releases and we get to know its story, I would attempt to make a MK11 story similar to this.

Thanks alot for your feedback again, DragnLdy.
 
I don't have strong impressions on cyber Sub-Zero, though I feel like it has the potential to make his story even more interesting and might make the whole Cyborg-Demon possession more personal than Noob-Smoke. It might take away from Smoke, though. As for Cyber Sub-Zero coming back, I imagine it might be possible to resurrect him to a point, but he'd probably be more zombie-like and more of a inhumane cyborg while his soul is owned by Quan Chi. I find idea of Tundra to be resurrected as his cyborg-self out of pure materialisation by the Elder Gods kind of weird, assuming that's how it would happen if not by just pure necromancy and restoration. I imagine it would easily be an opportune moment to undo his cybernetic change and return him to a human, but at the same time it would cheapen and undo such a drastic, tragic change. If they'd turn Sub-Zero back into a human I don't see why they wouldn't return Kabal back unburned and such but I guess it would help appease some of the complaints about Sub-Zero becoming a cyborg.

Overall, I don't really know what to think about Sub-Zero and I think he could go in a lot of directions; whichever NRS decides is probably going to have good story potential so they can't go wrong either way.
 
Outstanding. Although I feel it doesn't make sense for Raiden to just let Shujinko continue his quest especially after having visions of what happens when he completes it back in MK9.
 
Outstanding. Although I feel it doesn't make sense for Raiden to just let Shujinko continue his quest especially after having visions of what happens when he completes it back in MK9.

Thanks for the feedback. As far as Raiden's visions were concerned I didn't feel that he could understand them all clearly as indicated by him being unsure most of the time in the MK9 storymode, so there is a good possibility that he doesn't know that Shujinko's acts would lead to instability in the realms. As far as armageddon was concerned all Raiden knew was to stop Shao Kahn and nothing much more than that I feel.
 
What a story man, I really like how you managed to fit almost every MK Subplot of the MK4 era into a story of epic proportions, my favorites part were:
-The forming of a new team of Earthrealm defenders.
-Shinnok allying himself to other like minded villains throughout the realms and the almost surgical precision of his plan, a far cry from Shao Kahn's failed attempt through brute force, and a very nice way to subtly establish his character to thoses that don't know him.
-Rain in a MK Storyline, 'nuff said
-The corruption of Liu Kang's spirit, Raiden's not so much, but I may be biased because I really liked his Machiavellian turn from his Deception ending. I remember "marking out" as he killed Shujinko for being decieved, well er... Nothing personal but I thought it really was a justified turn and really a defining moment from the stale "I must protect earthrealm" Raiden. I'm also rooting for a character shift in MKX by the way?

Though as much as I like the story I can't help but be a tiny teensy bit dissapointed that you didn't take risks by adding much to the MK universe besides picking of from what what was already told to us post MK4 and MK9's arcade character ending. Mileena turning good after Shao Kahn's death being the only notable exception.
You see the problem as to why the post MK3 characters are so hated is that we really don't know much of anything about them, there's no way for people to relate or attach to them like there is for Sub Zero or Lui Kang. Let's take Kai for example (a character that I hope reappears in MKX): It's been told that he became related to the white lotus society in order to seek enlightenment and to escape the darkness that pollutes his soul, but what is that darkness in question, it should be shown rather than talked about in order for the viewer to relate. Also I've always associated the markings on his body as being aboriginal in nature (but I don't think most people have ever noticed), so a possible backstory for him could be a victim of racist abuse towards his people, maybe he got associated with gangs and seeks to atone for the errors of his way.
I mean I came up with that no actual experience in writing ever and you can see that it already gives more insight into Kai's mindset and moveset, Boomerang anyone. Erm, Anwyay besides these flaws it's been a really, really good read.
 
^ Thanks for the feedback TheDeaconBosco! I agree that I didn't introduce alot of new stuff, this was mainly because my focus was on further developing the original canon by closing out as much of the loopholes as possible and trying to keep the MK vibe by excluding potential fan-fic material. Also I wanted to bring out and focus on the post MK3 characters, to demonstrate the potential they have, at least storywise and thus kept away from any new characters as well. My main idea was for many of these post MK3 characters return again for MK11 where we would see them fleshed out much more and thus incorporating great ideas like the one you gave for Kai, once they had a good enough introduction in MK10. I had actually started an MK11 series which does exactly that, it fleshes out almost all the characters in the MK universe, along with getting into a alot of unexplored/unexplained areas in the original canon and introducing new ideas. I'll provide the link if you are interested. Thanks for your feedback, once again!
 
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