What reading material do you keep in the bathroom?

I usually either take the comics I haven't read yet (just today I read Deadpool #51 while taking a shit :)) or I watch youtube clips on my phone. I also have the Highschool Of The Dead full colored volume set in my bathroom too but I already read it all so I don't bother with it. It's usually there for other people to be honest. I'm considerate when it comes to my guest who have to do the poo poo at my house. No one likes a boring shit.
 
Say "Bloody Mary" in the mirror while you take a shit. Best shit ever.

My mirror is next to me lol so I can't look into the mirror while on the toilet

Off topic. But have you guys ever taken such a massive shit you start sweating and have to take your shirt off? ****ing intense.

No lmao but I have taken a dump, got up, looked in the bowl to see that there was blood on it :puke:

My era of constipation
 
I just read GameInformers or browse the web on my ipod. Sometimes I even talk to my friends on xbox live while on the shitter
 
My mirror is next to me lol so I can't look into the mirror while on the toilet



No lmao but I have taken a dump, got up, looked in the bowl to see that there was blood on it :puke:

My era of constipation

Imma tell you a story. One that happened about 2 months ago.

So me and a friend of mine (we'll call him...Alex) were hanging out and he got a call from his uncle who is rich as hell. They asked to come and house sit his mansion for a few days (not kidding. This house was huge (like my dick, just saying)) and he asked us to come over so he could give us a list of things to do and the rules of the house. I wasn't feeling too good that day anyways but my stomach wasn't hurting for the past hour or so, so I decided I'll drive me and Alex up there to get the rules and a tour of the mansion.

So we drive for 45 minutes to get there and right when we get to the end of the drive way, my stomach starts hurting. I remember thinking '****...I'm gonna have to use the restroom really really soon'. I met the guy (really nice but his wife is kind of a *****) and we took a tour of the mansion. This tour took I swear to god like 30 minutes but it felt like 2 hours. I'm trying my damn hardest not to shit my pants haha. He showed us like 5 different bathrooms and all I wanted to do was kick them out and take a fat shit, BUT I have this fear of shitting in public places unless I know I'm there alone. But anyways, we got through the whole mansion and I ran out of that house so fast that I'm surprised that I could even run that fast. I ran out of the house and got in my car and we left. I was doing about 90 in a 65 I believe. I made it home within 20 minutes or so because I was speeding and cutting people off and what not. I finally got home and my friend came into the house I ran straight to the bathroom and turned on the fan and let it rip! Best shit of my life, I kid you not. So intense I had to take off my shirt AND my pants.. Oh man it was crazy. I deserve an award for holding in a monstrosity for that long.

I remember Alex asked me if we could stop by a 7/11 to get something to drink.
LOL NO!
no.gif
 
That is awesomely disgusting :rofl:

I can never take a dump at someone else's house either. I'm afraid something is going to screw up.

Yeah, exactly. It's a dumb fear, I know but I just can't do it. When I was in school they'd let me go home to take a shit because they knew I couldn't do it at school.
 
I have only went #2 at school once. And only because it was at the point where I was literally about to go in my pants.

The bathrooms are atrocious :barf:
 
LOL I went to the bathroom once and there was a turd in the urinal

no-no-no-cat.jpg

Okay now you've spark another story.


So me and 4 other friends were going to the movies to go see 127 hours (this was when it was only in select theaters :p) and we were all joking around having a good time before the movie started. Well me and my friend Shane had to use the restroom. We went into the bathroom and no one was in there. Shane went into a stall and I went to the urinal. I unzip my pants and look down and look in the urinal and there's a fat dookie in the urinal. I laughed my ass off. Shane comes out of the stall asking what was so funny and I told him to look in the urinal and we just stood there laughing for a few minutes. We called the rest of our friends into the restroom and they all laughed. We ended up taking a picture of it and tagging each other on it on Facebook.

Spoiler:
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Man, that was a good day. Nothing like finding a dookie in the urinal.
 
Girls don't poop, so I can't contribute to this thread.

Lies. I have evidence.

That is awesomely disgusting :rofl:

I can never take a dump at someone else's house either. I'm afraid something is going to screw up.

Yeah, exactly. It's a dumb fear, I know but I just can't do it. When I was in school they'd let me go home to take a shit because they knew I couldn't do it at school.

I never understood this fear, honestly. If I have to poop, I find the nearest toilet and do it. No big deal if you ask me.
 
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